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I (36F) got my own place a year ago after living with roommates my entire 20s and a bf in my 30s. We actually broke
Anyone else feeling happier alone then with a partner in their current life state? I (36F) got my own place a year ago after living with roommates my entire 20s and a bf in my 30s.


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We actually broke up at the end of 2021 but the lease agreement kept us both there. I feel it didn’t let either of us really start to heal being in the same house. I think during that initial time I was not processing the breakup. It wasn’t a horrible breakup. We both made mistakes. He changed and to some degree I did too. I was his first gf ever and I had some past trauma, so combined we began to not function. Lots of stonewalling and shutting down. He’s since apologized: to me and he knows I’m in therapy to address my core issues. A few months after I moved, the breakup hit me hard. All my core traumas began to resurface. Depression hit me hard. All I wanted to do was be home with my dog. I was once fun, social, full of life and activities and I just wanted to be home. I WFH so that didn’t really do me any good long run. I’ve decided to battle my traumas head on instead of running from them, or using people and things to detract me from doing the WORK. You have to do the work. As I was doing the work, I began to hyper fixate that I’m 36 and alone. I have had 3 unsuccessful relationships. I began to see couples everywhere and really overthink my own mistakes and think that those people knew how to be good to one another and I was a mess because of my issues. It was getting bad and I stopped it. I was feeling as if at 36, I should have the love of a man or my worth is automatically lower. Illogical thinking. Lately I have gained a bit of clarity. I feel happy again. I realize I am okay alone. If I can’t be happy and single, how will I be happy with someone? I met my recent ex when I was happy alone- not seeking anything or anyone. I was on the apps right after my breakup and attracting people who I would never be with normally and I realize it’s because of where I was. You seek out where your at in life. We all do it. I also realized people on the apps can be brutal, are unhealed, etc .. I deleted the apps. Recently i met someone really cool in person at a festival and we have hung out. As friends. I realize if I live life without forcing anything, I tend to attract more. Anyone else feeling they are okay letting the universe bring them what they need/ want ? And not forcing it? I’m okay with being 36 and not having a husband/ bf. I don’t need it - I want it eventually but I am happy as I am. Пост в архиве. Нельзя добавлять новые комментарии и нельзя ставить оценки.













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